Rants and rambles

A mess of stress and fairly decent grades

Hello, its Misstery. And I seriously do not know what has come over me. I used to plan every blog and every fine detail of each post. But recently I have been blogging almost every day, and just having cute little chats with you guys. And it is so very enjoyable. I feel like blogging has become this secret addiction for me, like this little thing that only I know about. And it fascinates me that I am so truly devoted to this blog. Trust me, I am defintely still writing my usual more put together style of posts, because I like to do them, I like to write in definite detail. But these blogs, where I am just me. And you are just you. These blogs feel great to write as well.

 

So its another little chatty one, all day my hands have been aching to type, aching to just pour out all my feeling that I cannot express day to day because I am so ridiculously antisocial its literally unreal. So recently I have found that I have had the most awful lack of motivation, due to stress. It has gotten to the point where somebody else will pour their problems to me and I will reply with my usual inspirational speech. Which will usually end with me saying ” do what you love, love what you do, forget about work, I have so much work to do, work, work, work, shall we start a strike ” and me sobbing.

 

I just feel like, this year. I have been under so much stress. That in between every exam and every unit of brand new education topped with a pile of adult responsibility, I have lost a piece of myself. A piece of what makes me unique. But i guess that is just what school does. I watch it change people. And I don’t see how i have only just realised how much it has changed me.

 

Yet still, even though my motivation has gone down the drain, I don’t even know who I am, I don’t know what I want to do. And my dignity ran away long ago. I still try my absolute hardest. And I guess it got me places. Recently I recieved some results for a few pieces of work ( let me just say very important, future changing work). And I got all A’s. And as good as I felt about it. I also felt doubtful. Whilst everybody else was celebrating and asking eachother what grades they got. I just felt this sense almost like I was disappointed, not at the grade, not at the work, I was disappointed at the fact that all i got out of this, out of this whole process of stress, was a letter.

 

And I am not saying that letter did not mean anything. Because it did. That letter symbolises nights spent crying (I am not even joking), my intellectuality but most of all my effort. But I think it is rather funny. That I invest myself so much into everything, just for a letter (it was a pretty good letter though, to be honest with you.)

 

But I just feel like, there is too much stress. For my age there is far too much stress to handle. And it really angers me. I know I have written another post before, which goes into much finer deatail on the topic. You can read that post here….https://missteryblog.wordpress.com/2016/01/06/what-happened-to-my-beautiful-education/. ( i am so sorry for that self promotion, i am disgusted with myself)

 

Stress is like this part of education that we just assume is nessesary, when it really does not have to be. But there is only two choices in the situation. Try your hardest, feel the stress and try to deal with it. This choice means continuously feeling like shit. Or you could not try at all. And this choice means that your future is damaged. There is no way out of the stress. And that is what annoys me.

 

So lovelies, I just want to say. That if you are feeling stressed (most probably) then please please take a second to reavaluate your situation. It is a letter. A letter. It does not exsist, it is simply a metaphorical symbol used to inaccurately measure intelligence. Take a day off. Make sure you feel happy, you cannot allow yourself to dissappear bit by bit every day. The most important thing about life is that you are unique and individual, and you should never let anything including stress take that away from you. Because then, there is a grade. A letter, but no person.

 

Thank you all so much for reading. I am very sorry about all these chatty posts I have been doing recently, I really hope they are not boring you all out.

Please like, comment and follow my blog, it makes one stressed out person very happy.

Love, Misstery

 

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22 thoughts on “A mess of stress and fairly decent grades

  1. really intelligent post and I can relate to all your points. I think a work life balance is really important and by doing the things you love, you become more relaxed and do even better in school. Congratulations on the As that’s amazing!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Dear Misstery,
    I love what you are writing. You’re so right. Stress is so eating one away. It makes you do things that you wouldn’t do. But it is important for you to know that everyone is unique and everyone is individual. And we should learn to respect that. We should respect that everyone is different and that there is no normal. Well you see. It’s the same about grades. You have a letter and that letter can hurt you because you don’t have the letter you wanted to. But it can also delight you because it shows you that what you’ve done is rewarded by a better letter. But in the end it’s still just a letter. It’s not something that can kill you. It’s something that is there but it doesn’t make your future a mess. It won’t make life worse nor will it make life better. It’s just there. Well thanks for reading. I hope it helped. Bye 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Girl no matter what kind of post you’re writing they’re all soo amazing, lovely, great….!!! Thank you for letting me realizing again that it’s really only a grade, a sheet of paper. I’m someetimes too ambitious and making myself a lot of stress. Don’t be sorry about these chatty posts 🙂 I think nobody wants you to be xoxoxo <3333

    Liked by 1 person

  4. This is so true I swear I’m the most antisocial person ever and I don’t even know who I am, what kind of things I actually like while everyone around me seems to be free and talky and it’s really annoying. Especially for me and where I’m coming from I’m much more pressured and I have to do so many things…. Ib is hard (international baccalaureate) I guess we can all take breaks though right. AKA procrastination.We manage to get it done at the end at least. The internet has cut half of the work but at the same time it doesn’t make it any easier. We have more work actually with technology. But I must thank the internet

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Hey, I TOTALLY understand where you’re coming from here. And thanks for that advice – I’m the type of person to get stressed as hell over seemingly GOOD grades, but my mind locks itself into a loop.

    Liked by 1 person

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